I could have entitled this "The Art of Doing Nothing," but it's too structured and too precise. Doin' nuthin' is just that; it's like the feeling that comes with reading, "Huck Finn floatin' down the lazy meandering river, doin' nuthin'." See what I mean?

There have been volumes written on relaxation. In today's society filled with hustle and bustle, it's approaching an art form. Most of us don't tune out the world and just relax. It's not because we don't want to, but that we have lost the ability to zone out and totally rest.

Think about it, and you'll probably agree. We spend hours planning a vacation, still more hours packing, arranging for child or pet care, driving or flying to our designated respite, expecting an oasis in the chaos of life. But most of us fill our vacation hours from dawn to dusk with booked tours, programs, family visits, sightseeing activities and sporting events. We rush from place to place, take plenty of pictures, send e-mails to friends back home, mail the occasional postcard, pack, unpack and pack again. Upon arriving home, we unpack, get the dog, re-bond with the kids, do the laundry, spend a day putting all the pictures in politically-correct scrapbooks and resume life. I'm tired just writing about it, but sadly, that's a typical vacation and we wonder why we don't relax and we're always stressed!

Now granted, there are parameters in relaxing, namely time and resources. But this is not rocket science folks; an hour massage can buy you several hours of mellow afterglow, providing of course that you don't spend that time having a heated discussion with the masseuse, talking on your cell phone or plugged into an i-pod. We are so programmed and success driven; we feel that we always have to be thinking and doing. To "do nothing" casts a slight shadow of guilt upon anything that smacks of relaxing. Yes, I said it, the big "G" word.

For years we watched our parents' work, save and sacrifice until the golden age of retirement, only to then have a catastrophic illness or pass on before much fun or relaxing had been had.

We've created an even bigger monster, but take heed: there is a light at the end of the hand-honed tunnel. Here are some simple, inexpensive ways I've found to relax.

Swing

Guess I'd better clarify this one. Find a swing on a playground, get on it and pump to your heart's content. Remember Robert Louis Stevenson wrote, "How would you like to go up in a swing, up in the sky so blue... Oh, I do think it's the nicest thing ever a child could do."

Cloud Watch

Lay on the ground on a cloudy day and pick out animals in the clouds. However, if you're one of those people who can't see the man in the moon, you'll be hard pressed to see animals and shapes in clouds. Just watching the clouds roll by should be enough.

Sing

I mean it. Sing. Do it loudly, whether you're in tune or not. I'm talking about the kind of singing that comes from your diaphragm and involves your whole body. And, if you are out of tune, chances are anyone in listening range will be laughing anyway.

Laugh

The good thing about laughing is that it is not only good for your health and your soul, but it takes one third the number of muscles to laugh as it does to cry, so if you're worried about wrinkles, laughing is a great anti-aging activity.

Love

Take it from this grandma. Studies show that sex on a regular basis is a great stress reliever and is good for your health. However, it isn't the 60s anymore and love isn't free, so be responsible. Unprotected sex can be a real stressor.

Play

I can honestly say that some of the most fulfilling moments I have had in recent years have been crawling around on the floor playing peek-a-boo with my granddaughters. There is no way I can think of business or finances when I'm laughing and giggling with these precious little girls. The only stressor I have is figuring out how to get up!

I also suggest playing hopscotch. It's great exercise, unless of course you're obsessive compulsive or extremely competitive. There's nothing mature about beating a 6 year old.

Dance

Dance around the house, in your yard or down the street. Get some arm action in there and skip, twist and twirl to your heart's content. The neighbors may think you're a little crazy, but I promise you, they'll be envious as hell.

There are so many ways we can relax without taking a cruise or spending thousands of dollars on weekend-long self-help seminars. Turn off the television and phones, unplug the i-pod and let your inner child come out and play.


Ann will answer your e-mails just as soon as she's back from kite flying with the grandkids. Send your comments to her at ann@insidescv.com.