I never used to have this boisterous laugh. For years it was a soft, quiet giggle; "feminine," totally unobtrusive and decidedly not the "real" me. Thankfully, as years go by, I have slowly developed a from-my-belly-through-the-depths-of-my-soul kind of laugh. It's a I-don't-give-a-darn-what-I-sound-like type of laugh. It's the kind of laugh that makes other people laugh. But most importantly, it's the kind of laugh that feels good.

Growing up the l-word meant "love" or "like." I can remember childhood girlfriends talking about the l-word, usually in reference to their beloveds (whether the lucky gents knew about it or not is another story). Regardless, it was sacred back then. As I mature, I've added laughter and life to my list of l-words. Really, this triumvirate of words (dare I call them philosophies?) is the basis of my existence.

"As I mature, I've added LAUGHTER and LIFE to my list of l-words."

Laughing is the most wonderful thing to do. The nicest thing about getting older is that we can express our joy and really not care about impropriety. The young people chalk it up to our age, and the more cynical of our peers? Who cares what they think any more? I have a friend who snorts when he laughs. It's contagious and as I sit and write, I'm smiling at the memory.

A hearty laugh is a feel-good experience. It increases our endorphins and dispels gloom on even the saddest of days. I can remember my brothers and sisters and I huddled in the back of the funeral home after my paternal grandmother died some 45 years ago. We traded stories and held our hands over our mouths to stifle the giggles. That's what I want when I die; a good belly bustin' laugh fest. Many of my friends may come in their pull-up diapers, with walkers and canes but laugh they should and hopefully will.

I read once that it takes three times as many facial muscles to cry as it does to laugh, so doesn't it make practical sense to have a good guffaw once in a while? It's medically proven that people who laugh heal more quickly and stay healthier longer. The same is true for love. Of course there are many types of love and we have abused it to the point that it has lost its spirituality. Then again, this is an age of excess and if a little is good, a lot is better.

Sometime in my early 50s I awoke and realized that I was not immortal and this was not a dress rehearsal. It's this revelation that set me on a course of contemplation and resolve. I took my first deep-sea scuba dive recently. A dream of many years realized, this is the first of many dives and new adventures. My trip to Italy last year was really precipitated by the early death of two friends. I decided then that I wasn't going to wait until I retired, was wealthy enough or had found a new love to share the trip with. I took my son, lived the dream and hope to return.

We often criticize the younger generation for living in the moment, but that's exactly what I'm doing in this cycle of life. When we are born we are dependent on our parents for our love and well-being, in our passages we learn to take care of ourselves and find other loves. As a Boomer, I'm now, as are many of my peers, called upon to take care of a parent, a brief role reversal in the great scheme of things. And, as we near the end of our lives, it is our children and younger generations we turn to for love and well-being.

In this wonderful stage of life, when we can go to the grocery store without makeup and not care who we run into, be reconciled to baldness and love handles, and realize that eyes and smiles are much more meaningful than tight butts and perky boobs, life can be joyous. We can laugh boisterously in public without a care that kids and grandchildren are embarrassed, let our inner child out without concern of reproach, delight in life as only a child can and truly live, love and laugh as our maker intended for us to do. Be kind to yourself, seize the moment and enjoy it, whether you're 16, 36, 66 or 106. Life is too short not to.


Ann can be found skipping (carefully) through the tulips. While recuperating from the exercise, she checks her e-mail. Pen your missive to ann@insidescv.com.